Being pretty comes at a cost. Attention that I receive it great, but sometime its get a little strange.
Recent events that have transpired has made me think I am a creepy guy magnet. But let me start from the beginning. I remember what I think was my first creepy guy experience. I was 14 years old. It was a Saturday afternoon, and I was with my mom, my aunt, and I believe all of my 3 siblings. We had just come from a Saturday church service in Stockton so we were all dressed up. I always looked older than my age. This guy kept walking past me and I mean seriously staring, I mean like burning a hole in my forehead staring. This guy obviously was old enough to be my uncle if not my dad. He finally decides to approach me, but he doesn’t say anything he sticks his hand out to give me a piece of paper that had his phone number on it. I replied saying “I’m only 14”. He paused and thought then said “I’m 17”, and then reaches his hand out further for me to take his phone number. I don’t remember if I took the number and tossed it or if I still didn’t take it, but either way I did not reciprocate any desire to get to know him better. Then I remember a time when I was 17 years old and I was walking how from school. This older gentleman started talking to me. By older I mean elderly! Just thinking he wanted to converse, I engaged in the conversation. Then out of nowhere he said “so can I take you out sometime” my response was “I’m only 17”. Shocked the man walked away. Mind you, I was wearing a backpack and it was about 4pm, and we were right down the street from a high school, you could have put two and two together.
What happened this week truly supported the idea that I put off some vibe that attracts weird men. I was at a Starbucks on Sunday morning before church. The line was relatively long and I was thinking about what I would order when I heard a voice say “excuse me miss”. I turned and acknowledge the man. He says “do you know what time it is?” I didn’t have a watch or my cell phone and told him “I don’t but I know it’s after 10am”. He thanked me and continued on to say “are you from around here?” now let me interject; this man looked disheveled and scatterbrained. His tone was kind of cynical and eyes a little sketchy. I told him “yes I’m from Menlo Park” and turned back around. I tried my best to close the conversation. This line seemed to take forever!! I was in front of the pastry case when he sees my necklace and says “is that two arrows crossing?” I was just over trying to ignore him at this point so I told him it is but I’m unsure what it means. Knowing now at this point he wasn’t going to leave me alone, so I asked him if he was there for the arts and crafts festival that annually occurs downtown Menlo Park. He told me no he was there going to the Presbyterian Church down the street. Finally the barista took my order (thank goodness!) and the guy is helped by the counter barista. He got a pastry and sat down right by the front door (UGH!!!). While he wasn’t looking I ran out the back door.
Then yesterday (I know right??) a guy at the gas station (pumping gas waaaaay on the other side) was yelling out to me asking how my day was. I tried to ignore him. I turned my back didn’t make eye contact but this man was persistent. He was walking around the passenger side of his car (for no reason either, his gas tank was on the driver’s side) and then stopped and continued to try to spark a conversation with me. He waited until I turned around to have to remove the pump to try to get eye contact, or some type of acknowledgment. He walked over to me asking me if I’m familiar with the area. I told him I was. He asked me if there were any soul food restaurants around (was it because I’m Black???). I told him to go to CreoLa. I should have just said no but I didn’t want to lie. He started asking 11million billion questions about it. I just told him I’ve never been but my co-workers told me good things. He was like “oh okay, I’m about to go there right now” and started grinning like the Koolaid man, I guess assuming I would take that as an invite. At this point I was talking out the nozzle attempting to leave. He then starts asking me about TGI’s, yes he said TGI’s, asking about their drinks. I told him I don’t drink and then I walked away. If I didn’t need gas I would have left long before the conversation got that far.
After reflecting on those two incidents this week I began to be a tad nostalgic reminiscing on other creepy men. I had a guy at a community event hawking me for what seemed like an eternity. Out of nowhere he comes behind me and whispers in my ear “I seentchu peekin…” I turned around and looked at him with a look of horror and disgust. One guy that used to stay in my neighbor hood (I’m assuming because I saw him around but NEVER ACTUALLY MET HIM) came to my door one night and asked me was my boyfriend home. This was not only creepy but terrifying. A charter bus driver recently came to my job to pick up a group that was volunteering in our warehouse. I told him I’d let his group know he was there he replied “yeah… unless you wanna entertain me”. My response was “let me hurry and get your group!” A man that works at my church’s warming shelter recently sent a text message to my mom telling her her daughter (me) is the prettiest girl at the church. This man is almost my mom’s age, is in and out of jail and has in intermittent drug problem… oh and bad teeth! Oh yes!!! I sometimes volunteer at City Team Ministries in Oakland, and I was serving dinner one night. When I was leaving this homeless man said “that dinner sho was good!” I responded I’m glad you enjoyed it.” Then he said “maybe I can taste you…” I told him “ummm…NO, you can’t!!” SMH!! I forgot about Mario… this guy… creepy. I tried to leave out names but hey, whatever lol. My cousin introduced us, and we were “talking” for about a week or so when he came over for a BBQ at my old apartment with a bunch of friends, actually mostly his friends. Somehow he felt I was ignoring him (HELLO I’m entertaining an event at my own place!) and stormed off and was pouting on the steps and literally crying. I wanted him to leave, but everyone wanted me to talk to him to calm him down. He told me he tries to do everything he can to show me he cares about me and he really likes me. All I could think in my head is this man is crazy, I don’t even know his birthday or his middle name and I met him a week ago! Needless to say that was the end of our… “talking” I guess or whatever it was. And lastly, the man who everything he texted ended in “lol”. It would be like “how was your day lol?” “I just got off of work lol” “wanna go to SF lol?” “My grandma just died lol”… okay the last one wasn’t real, but you get the gist. I ignored him for days and finally responded to a text, he told me “I thought you were ignoring me or something lol”. That was our last correspondence. Unfortunately, this is only A FEW of the things that have happened to me!
This blog is to tell guys being creepy is not okay! We (ladies) talk about it and laugh about it behind your backs and we don’t find it attractive. If you question whether or not you are creepy, you probably are so fix it! Attractive women have to put up with enough and your weird antics and habits scare us… no they freak us out. Be appropriate! Sorry to hurt any feelings but I’m just being honest.