Tuesday, January 14, 2014

I hecka love my mom

My mother is an incredible woman. I would argue the fact that she is the best mom in the entire universe. She loves her kids so much and is the most compassionate person I know. Everyone who knows her loves her and she loves them even more. I don’t know how many times people have expressed to me how much they admire my mom and how awesome she is and what a blessing it is to know her. She sacrifices so much of herself and is a true vessel allowing God to use her in any way she is needed, her hands are never found idle. My dad is wondrous person as well; I’ll discuss him at a later date…

The summer before high school when I was 13, we found out that my mom had Thyroid Cancer. She might have had it for years but we didn’t know it. This was a really hard time on my family. My little sister was only a year old, and my aunt helped out majorly during this time. While my dad took care of business at home helping with all of my mother’s medical needs, paperwork, etc. my sisters (and brother for part of the time) and I went to Sacramento to stay with my aunt for the majority of the summer. My aunt is an angel sent from Heaven, I love her so much too. My mom during this time had to go into surgery to remove the cancer out of her body. After the surgery was complete, she ended up having to be rushed back into surgery because the surgeon pierced a vein and she was choking to death on her own blood. After she recovered she had to go into radiation treatment. She couldn’t be around anyone so she would have to go and have the treatment and go stay at a hotel for a week at a time.

I remember the first time I saw my mom in weeks when she came to Sacramento after she had surgery. We were at my aunt’s old church and my mom walked in. She was wearing an orange suit and had on her high heels, dressed to the nine as usual. She walked down the aisle and I had suck mixed emotions. I was so excited to see my mom, but at the same time so devastated. I had never seen my mom look so sick in my life. I was so heartbroken over the things that had happened to her but she was so strong about the whole situation and positive. I really saw how a person can go through Hell and yet thank God. I could have lost my might, but she is such a fighter and never gives up.

When I found out last April that I had a severely underactive Thyroid and Hashimoto’s disease, once again I had such mixed emotions. I was battling inside myself about how to deal with it. I didn’t want to talk about it because I didn’t want to give it life, but I couldn’t ignore it either. I also didn’t want people to think that I didn’t think God could deliver me, because I believed it then and I know that one day He will deliver me. I know that in front of people I save face, but something about talking to my mom can break me down. She had told me she told some of my aunts about it and I got so upset with her. I didn’t want anyone to know what was going on. I got off the phone with her and called back the next day to apologize. When I was talking she apologized for telling and I had to finally tell her why I didn’t want people to know. I didn’t want people to see me as weak or as if I had to be coddled. My mom started to cry and she told me how sorry she was that I was going through this and she felt such guilt because she had Hashimoto’s disease that lead to her Thyroid cancer. I never blamed her for it, it never even crossed my mind!! But I will never ever in my life forget what she told me in that conversation. She told me this “I hated cancer; I hated every bit of it and everything I had to go through. But if going through all of that let the doctor’s know what to test you for, I’d do it all again.” It was the most profound statement ever said to me.

Mom mother is a remarkable woman. Especially to me a woman to have a relatively absent mother and father growing up, she came out to be far past amazing as a woman and especially as a mother. I pity her parents who cannot take credit for the stunning person they created. The credit really goes to God, her godparents Lula and Earnest J. O’Neal, and my sweet sweet great grandmother Minnie Heath and I love and appreciate all they ever did for my mom.

This blog isn’t one with an underlying meaning. Just wanted everyone to know how phenomenal my mom is. If I can be half the woman she is, I’ll be pretty spectacular too.

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