Friday, November 15, 2013

A secret wedding

I know everyone opened up this blog assuming it was me! No!! lol, I didn't get married secretly but I know someone who did...

This past weekend, one of my co-workers got married. It wasn't anything big, they weren't even dressed up. Her daughter performed the ceremony in their backyard and the grandkids took pictures with their camera phones. Talk about low key! None of us even knew about it until one of her friend’s who volunteers at my job spilled the beans the Monday after! Now let me say this early my co-worker has been with this man for like over 20 years, and they live together. So marriage to her was not a big deal because to her they were already “basically” married. But she typically tells all about everything and anything that happens because we are basically family in our office. Several stories she’s told me I’ve heard at least 5 times so she definitely isn’t a shy gal! When I found out, I immediately sent out an email to the staff telling them what happened and arranged a small “bridal shower/wedding reception” for her. And of course it was a surprise. So we pulled our money together and I went to shopping!! I spent every last dime of the money and then some to make sure that we could give her the nicest surprise party on such short notice. Some of my co-workers also brought in prepared dishes and I got the cake and even purchased one of those wedding toppers with the bride and groom for it. We were scurrying around trying to decorate our conference room with streamers, confetti, cute party favors shaped like wedding dresses and tuxedos, balloons (that went flat ) flowers and center pieces to make sure it was beautiful. We also were convinced that she knew what was going on because she normally is completely nosey! People from our other offices even came by to help celebrate. While I was running back and forth trying to get everything together, one of my co-workers asked me “why are you so in to this? You’re going all out!” In my mind I feel like I hadn’t done enough, and I replied “I’m not going all out for this, you think I am?” and his response was “yes!” Regardless, I was beyond happy to put it together even if I did seem to be going overboard! It couldn’t help me self!

Finally, it was time to bring the bride in! I got everyone in the conference room and went to tell her that there was something I needed her to check in there so she followed me and when I opened the door everyone started yelling congratulations to her! And what I was hoping for happened; she started to cry. One thing that I always try to do is make people cry… tears of joy of course! I wanted her to feel like a bride and when I asked her did she feel like that she said she did. I’m not trying to give myself props for doing this, but I’m really glad I did because I found some very devastating new out in regards to why they finally decided to tie the knot.

A few months ago, my co-worker’s husband got sick. He only had about 40% of his lungs working before he even got sick. He ended up being hospitalized and found out he had pneumonia. After this he needed to use an oxygen tank when he was released. This part I knew what I didn’t know is the next part… He already has emphysema… and there is big change he has lung cancer. So, the two wanted to go ahead and get married in case anything may happen.
The purpose of this blog could be so many different things, like reasons not to smoke, or why people have secret weddings, how to put together a party in 3 days, is marriage just a piece of paper, but I want to take it a different direction.

When I found out about what she was going through, I was so happy that I did do all that I could to make it special for her. She is probably going through all types of hurt and pain right now and having a party that was all about her and all for her really touched her heart. It’s possible that she may be losing the love of her life soon. That is a dreadful thought in itself, but for it to be a reality it about 1,000,000 times worse. And I had no idea that she was dealing with any of this.

So, I understand now why she wasn’t so excited at first and I also understand why something inside of me kept pushing me to do as much as I could. It was a lot of work crammed into a very short amount of time but it was totally worth it to do something nice for someone who was going through so much in her life right now. At that very moment, she needed that love and support we were giving her and we didn't even know it. She needed a smile and a hug more than we could have ever imagined. It seems it came right on time.

One of the sayings I heard from my mom growing up is “a heap see but a few know”. You never really know what’s going on with someone just from looking on the outside. We all have our own burdens to bear and we all should be sensitive to that. You can’t expect people to react to things a certain type of way just because you do. That’s unrealistic if we are all supposed to be individuals at the same time!

So, the purpose of this blog… when you feel something inside of you pushing you to do something, do it. There is some reason why you can’t shake that feeling; someone is depending on you to be the one to show them you care about them when they probably feel at that moment no one cares at all what they are going through. I feel that this is something God is really wearing on me, to show love to others in ways I have never before. Don’t doubt those sensations you have to do something whether it is for someone else or for yourself. There is a reason for it even if you don’t understand. When you don’t know, God knows. Don’t deny what you feel in the pit of your stomach. So hug somebody, show some compassion and leniancy, tell them you love them even when there is no relevant reason in your eyes. Who knows, it might actually save someone’s life someday.

Also, anyone who reads this and is a believer, please pray for them, I would really appreciate it.

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